Elon Musk, the naturalized South African immigrant and founder of SpaceX and Tesla Motors, has announced that he will seek the 2016 nomination of the Constitution Party for President of the United States. Advise columnist and pundit Dan Savage was also announced as Musk’s intended running mate.
“I firmly believe that the Earth is 6,000 years old and immovably fixed, just like the Constitution says,” said the 43-year-old billionaire, from aboard his personal space station in low-earth orbit. “That’s why I have already taken the preemptive step of banning gay marriage in space.”
Asked about his running mate’s constitutional eligibility, Savage was defiant. “I don’t recall anything in Leviticus or Proverbs about having to be a ‘natural-born’ American. Are you sure you’re reading the right Constitution?”
Within hours, some high-profile members of the CP had already lined up to endorse the Musk/Savage 2016 ticket. Others, including at least one state party chair, expressed hesitation at the idea of nominating a candidate who does not endorse the use of Predator drone strikes against abortion clinics.
Legal experts consulted by Independent Political Report, confirmed that their is no constitutional barrier to electing a President who refuses to return to Earth upon his election. “There’s nothing that the really says, per se, that a President can’t take the oath of office on Mars.” according to one law professor, who asked to remain anonymous.
Perhaps Mike Ness (lead singer of Social Distortion) could run for the Libertarian nomination.
Pe
I think you’re right.
“I want Cody Quirk and Trent Hill to weigh in on this before dismissing it as yet another feeble April Fool’s Day article!”
I don’t know, this does sound pretty legit here :p
“That’s why I have already taken the preemptive step of banning gay marriage in space.”
At last, someone who has their priorities straight!
Asked about his running mate’s constitutional eligibility, Savage was defiant. “I don’t recall anything in Leviticus or Proverbs about having to be a ‘natural-born’ American. Are you sure you’re reading the right Constitution?”
Savage must have borrowed his copy from Ted Cruz.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2BaksqH2YXQ
Oh Lord… not the ring! I’ve been trying to kick the hobbit!
Some people eat a ring that has a savage musk to it, but most people wouldn’t call it a deodorant.
“I think Savage/Musk would have a better ring to it. But, admittedly, that’s a matter of taste.’
You eat your deodorant?
I think Savage/Musk would have a better ring to it. But, admittedly, that’s a matter of taste.
“That’s why I have already taken the preemptive step of banning gay marriage in space.”
Thank Goddess someone is finally adressing this abomination.
I want Cody Quirk and Trent Hill to weigh in on this before dismissing it as yet another feeble April Fool’s Day article!